Christmas Weekend

I have tried this whole weekend, to put the rather unfortunate incident behind me... and succeeded somewhat. Only now, as I'm going to bed on Sunday night.. I know I'm going to get calls I don't want to get, and have to do things I don't want to do, starting tomorrow morning. So I'm taking a pause right now to savour the last moments of my Christmas joy.

Christmas Day began alright... I was meant to play for mass, but somebody else requested to play so instead, I cantored at mass for the first time in the longest time ever. I forgot how it felt to stand at the altar and sing in front of hundreds of people... everytime I made a slight mistake I felt like I was being judged by that hundreds... which is probably an unfair assumption on my part (or not, I don't know).
Mass could have been so much better. The keyboardist was tentative, we couldn't hear the music accompaniment.. and the choir was almost going a whole tone flat. I was cringing inwardly at the musical imperfection but diplomacy relegated me to suffer that imperfection in silence. It really wasn't all that bad - but for a Christmas mass, I felt like it was such a let-down. It wasn't that the music wasn't good.. it just wasn't confident enough. And it makes such a difference to have that confidence and general upbeatness in the music because it plays such a crucial role in leading a mass.

I then came back from mass for my traditional Christmas Day Extended Family Lunch Gathering... I haven't seen my cousins and relatives in ages - but it felt the same. We were playing, this time not with our toys, but with my youngest brother's toys (to humour him)... while watching hilarious chinese films starring Stephen Chow, the 4th Golden Horse Awards (Chinese equivalent of the Oscars award ceremony) and the likes. My cousins were mocking my rusty Mandarin skills and general lack of knowledge for the film stars (I kept asking who was who).. but honestly, I hate celebrity news. It's not just I don't watch Chinese films all that often now. I did make it a point however, to make a mental note to myself to do some research on the industry... it's quite ironic for a film studies student not to have knowledge of the second biggest film industry (after Bollywood - yes, Hollywood is third largest, contrary to expectations) and even worse that all film academia have been largely concentrated on European and American cinema, when this industry has been sorely neglected - in terms of academic studies written in English, at least. I'm so glad we're doing at least one film from this industry for next term's Aesthetics.. I am immensely looking forward to listening to what Jose would have to say about Wong Kar Wai's In the Mood for Love .. and I will be the only one who won't have to read subtitles!

(Just fyi, I realised that Andy Lau is like the oriental equivalent of Pierce Brosnan. Sexier and more charming...with age. Tony Leung doesn't seem to have ripened with age in the same way... but all this is subjective.)

Met with the girls to watch Phantom of the Opera at night... all I could think about during the film was Richard Dyer's essay on 'Entertainment and Utopia', mapping the film theories onto the film. I had to consciously stop myself from thinking of it and just taking the film at face value - I'm seriously never going to enjoy anything remotely frivolous if I keep doing this. And then I remembered the MEP (Music Elective Programme) days back in MG when we took a module called Phantom of the Opera (yes, there was such a module) where we actually sat around training to sing the songs from the musical. Fond, amusing memories of the pure innocent frivolity of youth.

Group of us then went round to Q's where everyone gathered - I met Abby again after two and half years of not seeing her (can you believe it's that long?) - the last being August 2002 when I sent her off at the airport. We were almost in proper tears as we screamed and hugged each other (okay, Abby screamed, I half-screamed)... it had been far too long a time. The whole group of us spent the whole night until almost 4 in the morning just drinking, eating and watching the stars while having general catching-up conversations about everything and anything. I love it when you've not seen a friend in ages, but when you meet again to talk after the longest time, that connection which once bound you as friends is still there in the deepest, most intangible, but most comforting fashion. It was lovely.

I slept at 5, got up at 9 to play for mass today, which was good. Then attended a wedding dinner tonight. I was initially really excited about going for it as I haven't attended a proper dinner in ages... but then, after going for it, I remembered why I haven't attended one in ages.
I've forgotten how tedious a ten-course Chinese wedding dinner could be. I could easily write a list of the ten definite things that will happen at such an event, with relatives making the most typical of conversations that never seem to be outdated with time.
Amidst renditions of cheesy love songs in the background, the screening of a 'love-video' made for the newly-wedded couple, the long-Oscar-like-thank-you-speeches (made both in English and Chinese), and waiting almost three hours for a 10 course dinner to be served at half-hourly intervals, I couldn't decide if it was reluctant affection or mild contempt I had for the whole rigmarole at the end of the day.

All in all, I think I had a rather fulfilling weekend - quality friends and family time.

And it has been ages since I've had the luxury to sit down and write out any events as detailed as what I've written so far.